Come to SLCC 2010: Hillsville, VA

Plan to attend the next Second Life Community Convention!

by Pappy Enoch

I been reading New (Fake) Wirld Notes by Mistophur Au (http://nwn.blogs.com/nwn/2009/03/conventional.html) how the city folks am fightin’ worse than a barrel of starvin’ pole cats about where tu have that SLCC corn-vention.

Stop bein’ so dang ornery! I ain’t got the money tu git my butt to San Fran o’ Lost Vegas, so here am a rite fine idear that will satisfy everyboddy: y’all come on East fo’ a change!  Hillsville am the place!

Y’all just sit down while I makes my case fo’ Hillsville, VA. Tell them Lindens tu listen up! 2010 am gonna be here any day now!

Haute Cuisine: Hillsville Diner

Now we gots our share o’ fast food fodder n’ whatnot. Forgit it! Visit our famus diner. They gots homemade pies an’ the best dang blue-plate specials in the Mountuns. On weekends we brings up our hot-rods tu show ‘em off!

I recommends the chicken-fried steak wif taters n’ peas n’ a Co-cola tu make a natural-born man yell “Hoo Whee!”

Diner closes rite early an’ don’t take no charge-plates.  In Gawd we trust: yu pays cash.

Fine Shoppin’ Boutiques:

Harmon’s “Boot Capital of VA” http://www.harmonstore.com  gots steals n’ deals on Justin, Levis, Wrangler, Lee, Carhart, Stetson, an so much more it makes a po’ boy want to rob a bank, just so he kin dress up like a big-bug.  Pappy’s pick: Justin Goat-skin work gloves. They fits rite good an am soft as a city-gal’s behind.

Big Flea Market & Gun Show: Since ya’ll likes tu meet nigh unto Labur Day yu mite catch some deals at the show! Then yu kin go rootin’ in yo’ trucks n’ shoot sum’fin. http://www.vfw1115fleamarketgunshow.com/

Cultural Atrackshuns:

After I empties my pockets in ol’ man Harmon’s store,  I luvs cruisin’ thru his Harmon Museum http://www.harmonstore.com/ They gots Civil War stuff (about how we won it, of course) an’ the 1912 shoot-em-up at the Hillsville Courthouse.  Sum o’ mah ancesturs frum Enoch Holler was there, but none of ‘em got shot—damn shame, sum Herald readers mite be thinkin’ now.

Franklin County, “the wettest county in the wirld” am not a far piece up the road frum Hillsville.  They stuck a fancified name on the “Histerical Society,” but it got mighty fine displays on makin’ Shine an’ runnin’ frum the law. http://www.franklincountyvirginiahistoricalsoc.org/

Old Fiddler’s Convention: http://www.oldfiddlersconvention.com/  Galax VA ain’t far, and the fiddlers rosin up their bows every August (early on). So hop in the truck an’ visit us early so’s yu kin git a two-fer: Bluegrass/Ol’ Timey AND SLCC!

Town of Floyd: Live Bluegrass at the Country Store: dance, sing, eat an’ drink tu much an still git tu church tu repent on Sundays: http://www.floydcountrystore.com/

Hell, yu cain’t toss an empty jug in Floyd wif’out hittin’ a good musician. http://www.floydvirginia.com/music/index.html

Places tu Stay:

Now I reckon yu cood check intu some ding-dang motel o’ bread-for-breakfast place, but yu ain’t gonna du no better’n campin’ in Hillsville or  thereabouts.  They am awl set up fo’ motur-homes o’ tents. 

Jist string up some colored lites, open sum strong drink, and let the good times roll!  Yu kin git drunk n’ nekkid any ol’ place in August. Sleep on the dang ground if’n it blows yo’ hair back.

See awl yu city folks in Hillsville in 2010!

Comments

[surreality]

Pretty funny, though I was a little disappointed, after clicking through the headline from my feed reader, to discover that there isn't really a SL gathering planned for Hillsville, which is in fact in a lovely area in the Blue Ridge Mountains (and very convenient to my RL home). And the Galax Fiddler's Convention is awesome!

[Just Me]

Any good-ol' boy knows it's "Lost Wages" , not "Lost Vegas" !

[Crap Mariner]

Hoooo wheeeee... that's quite a savings over dem dar Vegas and San Francisco!

Does Greyhound sell First Class tickets?

-ls/cm

[Pappy Enoch, Cub Reporter]

@ Just Me:

Yu writ "Any good-ol' boy knows it's "Lost Wages" , not "Lost Vegas" ! "

I ain't got no wages tu lose, ol' son. So I'd bee lost in Vegas, less'n I cood hit a fat-cat ovur the head an' git sum foldin' money.

I wished Miss Pixeleen had run them-thar pics I dun sent o' the flea market, the diner, an' whatnot. Yu just Barney-Google "Hillsville Diner" in the Images part an' yu'll know why it am a piece o' heaven (as corn-pared to SL, anysohow).

[Jumpman Lane]

i'm gonna tell ya some good shit. I'm from VA and know exactly where hillsville is. come down here with that bullshit. You might not make it home. i'm goin to one of these rl meet ups one day and put my foot in some asses.

[Eva Ryan]

/me plays Dueling Banjos for ambiance.

[Melissa Yeuxdoux]

You know, one of the advantages of being a programmer is that not everybody thinks they can be a programmer. People don't pull you aside at parties and urge you to look at this new sort routine they just wrote.

OTOH, just about everybody thinks they can be funny.

This article shows that not everybody can be funny.

[Jumpman Lane]

hehehehe say that two times melissa.

[non]

OMG This scared the shit out of me to see in my feed reader. I live near there!